It’s without any doubt that while some mothers-in-law can be real monsters, some can be angelic and amazing. Irrespective of how awful or lovely she is, the relationship with the mother-in-law is a very sensitive one.
Being the mother of your spouse, there are some rights she has over her son/daughter and there is nothing you can do about it. While she may never regard you equally like her children, you can at least coexist peacefully by watching your words and actions, else your marriage is going to be a battle ground with you on the losing side.
These are things you should avoid saying to your mother in law.
1. We are not in a hurry
Always be patient with your mother-in-law and respect her. African mothers-in-law have this tendency of pushing couples to get kids once they are married. Even if you have no plans to get kids soon, never make it known to your mother-in-law. Let it be a secret between you and your spouse with no third parties. If she asks why you are yet to get her a grandchild, just tell her that you are working towards it.
2. She/he is terrible in the bedroom
Again, what happens in Rome should remain in Rome. If your husband/wife finds it difficult to rise to the occasion, don’t report him to his mother since she is not a sex therapist. Sharing your bedroom details with your mother is uncouth and disrespectful. Consult a sex therapist for proper guidance, not your mother-in-law (she is likely going to do more harm than good)
3. We are in a different generation
The fact is that you belong to two completely different worlds, but this is the least thing she expects to hear from you. If she tries counselling you concerning your marriage, just pay attention to her even if you are not ready to take her old ideas (though some of their counselling is awesome).
4. This family is mine!
Your Mother in-law for some reasons may not like the way you bring up your kids or the way you relate with your spouse. She may have weird opinions concerning how you run the home, be patient with her and resist the urge to remind her that she should not interfere with your family matters (she shouldn’t interfere though, but she has a say. Consider some of the things she says, but don’t let her in too much; It’s your family)
5. Calling her names
Being the mother of your spouse makes her deserve respect just like your own mom. The same way you can never call your mom names irrespective of what she does, so should it be with your mother-in-law. She might be a real monster but you still need to be very careful with the words you use on her.
6. The food is awful
Don’t complain about her food (Comic Vine). Did she offer to make dinner for you, appreciate it and be glad that she did it willingly. Her food might be a little different but it is wrong picking a fight with her by dissing her kitchen skills.
7. Mama, Leave my house!
Telling her to leave because she caused you pain is like pouring fuel into a fire, and you won’t like the outcome. She might push you to the wall, but try never to make go earlier than she planned going. (Though in some cases, when she tries putting difference between the couple stand up for what you believe in and if she leaving will save your marriage, then she should leave but be ready to make up with her as soon as possible).