Making a woman happy is compared to mission impossible in Nigerian Relationships, reasons being that only a few men succeed in making their spouses happy and at the same time have the maximum respect of their woman.

The Nigerian Man’s perspective shows 15 great ways to make a woman happy and get her respect equally.

  1. Always leave money in your pocket for her to take ;not steal oh. The higher the denomination the higher the respect. If you leave  ₦10, you get  ₦10 respect. But for the highest of highest respect, leave hard currency. This is necessary. When she wakes up in the morning, you ‘ll see how happy she’s because she has succeeded.

 

  1. Never ever argue with her on the price of anything. If she tells you a bag of rice is  ₦30,000; don’t argue. Just give her the money. No need calling mama Sidi to ask how much it actually is. It brings about “see finish” (Se o tan e!). If she tells you no milk give her the money, don’t go checking the cupboard to ensure it’s actually finished.

 

  1. Always admire and praise her. Even if she looks like monkey licking lime, tell her she’s the most beautiful woman you’ve ever seen. Praise her k-leg, flat nose, olipi etc.

 

  1. Give her money even if she’s working. Women love men’s money. I don’t know why. Give her without her asking you. It increases respect. Give her money to perm her hair, to buy chewing gum or to buy  ₦100 recharge card.

 

  1. Always bring paper bag home for her. Even if it’s groundnut that’s inside. Don’t ever return home without anything for madam. Am so used to it that i bought home worm medicine once.

 

  1. Treat her like a queen. Pet her like an egg. Listen to her. Don’t shout her down for any reason. Even if she’s not making sense, laugh holding your head and belle.

 

  1. For the other room biz, it shouldn’t be all about you. Don’t come home and say “mama John go and wait for me in the room” or you come home smiling and tell her “konji dey do me” without asking how she is.

 

  1. Go out with her whether you have a car or not. I know a lady the only time she entered her hubs car was when she was in labour! It’s not good, brother.

 

  1. Don’t steal her money but she can take yours. Wives don’t steal but take. Any man that ‘steals’ his wife’s money loses respect without applying for it.

 

  1. Always be impressed with her food. Even if the egusi is just water and leaves on one side while melon is on the other, lick your hands. Afterall if you had wanted a good cook, you for marry caterer.

 

  1. When you come home in the evening always have your bath especially before the other room biz. This is very important if you are a truck pusher or a breaker of logs. No woman wants to lick your sweat.

 

  1. Never ever press toothpaste from the middle. Press from the bottom. Also don’t wear sandy shoes into the house or use your shoe to climb the bed. It brings about “see finish.”

 

  1. When she travels for only one week with the children, don’t use all the plates, pots, cups and spoons in the house and pile them up for her to come wash. She’s not your housegirl. Try and wash them brother. Don’t also soak your clothes for her to come wash. She’s not a washing machine.

 

  1. Don’t come home at 1:00 am and expect her to come open the gate for you. She’s not your GM. If you know you are a bat get a GM to be opening gate for you.

 

  1. Summer holiday is coming take her on a vacation. Don’t be too selfish. Take her to the beach even if it’s Osun Osogbo river.

THE END!!

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